Insuring Successful Relationships
How can I make sure that my relationships will last? This is a common question asked by young people, many from families where siblings or parents have divorced. This is an important question. About fifty percent of marriages in North America end in divorce and the rates are much higher in some other countries. Many of these people felt that they were in love when they married, yet their marriages ended in the pain of divorce.
How come fifty percent of marriages seem to work and fifty percent don’t? It seems to me that it has a lot to do with how much insight people have in themselves and their behavior. The new website that we are creating is partially to help people with just such a need for self-knowledge.
Many people marry when they are still caught in the family pattern. They act as if they are trying to continue their parent’s marriage, or trying to have a marriage which is exactly the opposite. Both of these patterns tend to create problems.
Important questions to ask are: What attracted me to this person? What am I looking for in relationships? What part of me seems to be hungry for completion? How much can I expect this person to carry that part of my personality? Sometimes people say: “I’ve been carrying him/her for years. When do they finally pick up their end and help carry the relationship?”
So making relationships last is not just about being in love. Marriages are not made in Heaven. We can love many people but the better we know ourselves the more success our marriage will tend to have.
We will be talking a lot more about this in the coming weeks.
This is what I think. Do you have any insights to share?